Friday, May 23, 2008
Marry Him! An interesting article.
You have figured out by now that I like to podcast Dennis Prager (and also Dave Ramsey, on finances.) I heard Dennis interview a woman who thinks a lot of modern, well educated women miss out on Mr. GoodEnough waiting for Mr. Perfect. She wrote an article in The Atlantic which I recommend to you. This could be particularly poignant for young women in medical training; medicine is a jealous career.
Since DenverDocDaughterOne is getting married in a month (!!!), I'm going to use my soapbox. What did I tell my daughters?
1. Look at how boyfriend's DAD treats boyfriend's MOM. That is his modeling.
2. Use your brain early on. Someone in the relationship has to use her brain, and I'm telling you most of the time it is not the guy.
3. As a Christian, you have the obligation to have some friends that are projects, that need help. But you ALSO need some friends who are good for you. Of critical importance is, you DO NOT marry a project!
(at this point, DenverDocWife pointed out that "Dear, all men are projects.")
Yes, most women do believe this. Many men need a little bit of finishing carpentry and that is a cute hobby. But some men need deep foundation repair, and you do not want to try to repair deep foundational issues in a spouse. You cannot change another human being; most of us have a great deal of trouble changing ourselves!
4. If at any time you decide this guy is a poor risk for the long term, get out now. There are lots of other guys out there. You may get stuck emotionally if you keep going out with the wrong guy.
OK, back off the soapbox.
Since DenverDocDaughterOne is getting married in a month (!!!), I'm going to use my soapbox. What did I tell my daughters?
1. Look at how boyfriend's DAD treats boyfriend's MOM. That is his modeling.
2. Use your brain early on. Someone in the relationship has to use her brain, and I'm telling you most of the time it is not the guy.
3. As a Christian, you have the obligation to have some friends that are projects, that need help. But you ALSO need some friends who are good for you. Of critical importance is, you DO NOT marry a project!
(at this point, DenverDocWife pointed out that "Dear, all men are projects.")
Yes, most women do believe this. Many men need a little bit of finishing carpentry and that is a cute hobby. But some men need deep foundation repair, and you do not want to try to repair deep foundational issues in a spouse. You cannot change another human being; most of us have a great deal of trouble changing ourselves!
4. If at any time you decide this guy is a poor risk for the long term, get out now. There are lots of other guys out there. You may get stuck emotionally if you keep going out with the wrong guy.
OK, back off the soapbox.
